Testing the Waters

The First Path

The first steps down a new path are nerve-wracking. Not because they're particularly precarious - but simply because they're the start of something new and unknown. For that reason alone, many of us will never even considering taking those first steps. Few will consider the possibility; fewer still will venture forward without a guide of some sort. I certainly fall into the later category.

Call it my traditional-mindedness, but I'm supremely aware at all times that those who have come before me took time and effort to carve paths for their progeny. Simultaneously, I'm feeling aware that it's possible to forge a path of my own. However, I think the first path I personally explore is going to need a Sherpa. As such, I've read a couple of books recommended to me by a very close friend. Honestly, those books were the first few feeble steps I took down this path without even recognizing it. 

I've also picked up a new book that I'm currently working through: The Path of Paganism by John Beckett. I'm really enjoying this work as it helps me to define and understand what historical and modern Paganism look like. 

Jumping In

I'm no stranger to religious experiences - but as John points out early in The Path of Paganism, religious experiences without placing them in a framework are meaningless. Because of my previous path, any religious experiences I had were placed solidly within the bounds of Catholicism.

I've had moments of deep spiritual clarity after prayer, connection with the male divine, experiences of a female motherly spiritual presence [Mary Mater Dei, in that context], felt the protection of angels, etc. But I realize that all of those experiences could also be framed in a different context that would absolutely change their meanings.

Some Background

In Catholicism, there is one Supreme Being - namely the triune God extant in perpetuity, having no beginning nor end - sicut erat in principio, et nunc, et semper, et in saecula saeculorum. The Second Person of the Trinity became incarnate roughly 2,000 years ago in fulfilment of many ancient prophecies - those from the Jewish tradition and those even from Eastern traditions [ie. the three wise men who came from the East at the birth of Jesus]. 

In this framework, my experiences were completely hierarchical. The only divine experiences I had were of God directly - the experiences of angels/saints/etc. would have been supernatural only in their extent that they worked in the cooperation of God to produce those effects. This idea is clear in the definitions of the types of worship in this framework - latria [sacrificial worship reserved solely for God] vs dulia [reverence given typically to saints/angels - save for hyperdulia reserved for the Blessed Virgin]. 

In addition to natural causes, other spirits [namely demons and the like] also are said to have preternatural abilities - those things above nature or manipulative of nature, but not of divine origin. In comparison, most definitions of magick could probably be described as preternatural. 

Different Frameworks

In a different framework, all or most of my experiences could be explained in a supernatural sense - that is, if there are multiple gods and not a singular all-encompassing God, then those motherly experiences could have been from a female deity; the same is true for those angelic protections that I felt - perhaps other deities concerned with my protection.

It also opens the doors for other preternatural experiences. I've had moments of intense spiritual clarity not just after prayer, but while listening to music or playing games or even having conversations with strangers. In addition, I've had tarot cards speak to me on a couple of occasions now. The first time this happened (mentioned in my previous post) it was completely unexpected and caught me off guard as it happened in a decidedly non-religious setting [a tarot reader at a renaissance festival changed my life and I'm not ashamed of it]. 

As I keep this journal of experiences, it's also worthy to note that I've been wearing stones and copper for the first time in my life and I definitely feel better. Are these items physically affecting my body à la magick? Is it a placebo effect? Even if so, the power to affect my mind and have my body heal itself is actually an interesting topic to ponder. 

Either way, I feel as if I've experienced magick, and that alone merits exploration.

More Thoughts on Traditional Theology

In traditional Catholic theology, God created the universe and all that exists within, including all of the natural laws. However, the angels are in charge of various natural aspects of the natural universe - angels that move the cosmos, angels of weather/storms, etc. I've always liked this view and understanding - especially the image of traditional priests/bishops standing on the steps of their churches, staring down an impending storm and ordering with authority the angel of that storm spare his people - that is the powerful interaction with world that I long for. In fact, it is because of those powerful symbols and rituals that I practiced traditional Catholicism as opposed to any other branch of Christianity. 

In another framework, though, the same experience could be explained with another deity and the power of magick and the experience would be no less meaningful - and at the end of the day, who can say which interpretation is correct? Ultimately, Truth dictates that there must be a correct interpretation, and that is what I'm searching for [thanks, Aristotle]. 

Initial Direction

Thus leads me to my conclusion for the day - I'm especially interested in the gods as I take these first steps outside of my traditional theology. If there are more gods than I'm aware of, I long to know them. Know who they are, why they are, what they do, what they cannot do, and how they relate to me. 

Raidho - Journey

I'm especially drawn to the ancient religions of Egypt and Sumer, Zoroastrianism, and certain European/Norse traditions. I'm excited to learn more about these religions, but more importantly I'm excited to experience these religions and see where I'm at spiritually in six months from now.

I'm taking my time reading The Path of Paganism, letting the ideas sink in and really contemplate them. The next chapter on the gods is calling to me, though, and I'm looking forward to reading it. More to come soon!